I can’t handle another break-up, I’m afraid to die alone, and other reasons (not) to get married

Funny, poignant, and strangely helpful piece on the humor site Wait But Why about what happens in long-term relationships, and how to decide what, exactly, to do about them.


The Marriage Decision: Everything Forever or Nothing Ever Again

There’s not really any normal way to start a relationship. Some people go on a date, and then another date, and then another, and one day it’s just clear to both of them that they’re in a relationship. Some people start seeing each other, but they keep things black and white until a “So are we doing this?” conversation makes it official. Sometimes a platonic friendship forms first and tension builds under the surface until an unexpected kiss lights the friendship on fire.

But there’s usually some first time that this happens:


And suddenly, you’re here:


Your new relationship is with you all the time, even when you’re not together.


You’ve left the rest of shitty humanity behind, and it feels great. Then this happens:



And all the song lyrics make sense.

It goes on like this for a while, but as the months pass, you notice things changing. The unicorns turn into horses and then bikes and then one day, you’re not riding anything at all. The perfect person you found starts to say and do imperfect things. Some of those funny quirks you adored early on seem to be striking you as more annoying than funny. And it starts to dawn on you that you might be dating a fucking dick.

Read more…


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